"Sorry, fairy tale lovers, but true love is something reserved, by and large, for virgins. True love is for the chaste. True love is for married couples, we who do the work and take the oath of marriage, and devote our lives. You cannot get what we have without doing what we do, no matter what your toothpaste commercial philosophy might say."
Something to think about.
You know who I'm talking about.
A guy who:
(1) doesn't understand the meaning of relationship
(2) is in full reproductive mode (just in it for the physical)
(3) is very good at making girls think he is into them (also very proficient at breaking said girl's hearts)
(4) often "dates" several girls at once (girls are often unaware of each other)
Now, there are guys who date several women, but are actually really into the girls they are taking out. This post is not about them.
These are the guys who date just to date. Or to "get some". They are rarely single for long, and seem to have a different girl on their arm every month. Or even every week. Occasionally, they might get involved in something serious, but their week is a total loss if they don't have at least one date. They seem to ask everyone out around you.
Except you.
So you think "Why? What's wrong with me? If we're friends and he's asking everyone else out, why not me?"
It's probably because you're too good for him. And he knows it. While he feigns wanting to be serious and settle down, when it comes to someone who is actually worth settling down for, he avoids it at all costs.
Really, you're better off for it. Do you really want to date someone who has kissed 5 other girls in your ward just this month? No, of course not.
So, even if he's cute, charming, and everything you want in eye candy, he's just that. Eye candy. You want someone with staying power.
I got a booty call last night.
Now, remember that based on our shared religious convictions, this was limited to making out. Nothing crazy.
About six months ago, he and I had a random, non-committal encounter based off a Facebook conversation. We hooked up again a few months later. I thought I'd offended him that time, for reasons I won't go into, so I wasn't expecting to hear from him again.
He started off coy by asking what I was up to and if I wanted to see a movie. Considering we've never just hung out, I knew what he was going to get at as soon as I saw that I had a text message from him. When I declined, citing a need to study, he quickly jumped to his point.
Now, I know I said that I usually perceive hand-holding as more committal than kissing, but it still should mean something. Obviously, it hasn't always, but I certainly prefer it when it does. We all have needs and frustrations, but in some ways, it's even more frustrating to just kiss someone I don't have feelings for. It's not as satisfying. Additionally, this guy isn't even particularly good at the kissing.
So I didn't go. I am totally okay with that. I really did have to study and non-satisfying kissings didn't sound terribly appealing last night.
Will I kiss someone I don't care for again, ever? Probably. At some point. Maybe it'll even be this guy. I could give him some pointers. His future kissing partners might thank me.
