Monday, September 19, 2011

Oh yes. That will work.

Don't get me wrong--I love my ward. I love being in a family ward. I love the diversity of experience and age and education.


I don't really love the well-meaning but slightly stupid things people say sometimes. There are many people who say well-meaning and non-stupid things, but the few who say things that are actually stupid are the ones who drive me batty. Yesterday one of them metaphorically cornered me after church. She and her husband are parents of several boys of varied ages. The older ones aren't married yet and they're getting worried, so she told me of her husband's solution: get all the single people together, line them up facing each other, arrange them by height and age, and then just pair them off.


While my brain was thinking "good heavens!" my face was friendly and amused and I laughed as I engaged in that particular conversation. I admit I HAVE had moments when I appreciate the idea of arranged marriages, but know that it's no way to "solve the singles problem". Just marrying someone the same age and taller than me won't mean I'll be happy or that it's right. I know a lot of tall guys around my age, and there is at least one you couldn't PAY me to marry. This is the 21st Century! I am not considered property and I am NOT a problem to be solved. I suppose some people still don't see that a single person can be pretty darn happy with her life as it is.

Still, I can't help smiling because she seemed so concerned for my welfare. Bless her for that!


Angela Noelle of SK said...

Argh, how frustrating.

My husband and I took a few years to conceive. By few, I mean 7. I had people telling me we needed to "do it" on green sheets, as though it was an obvious solution to our problem - a solution our fertility specialist had apparently overlooked. It's amazing how well-meaning/humourous folk can fail to sense poor aim.

Most of the time I laughed at ill jokes and comments, but some days it's exhausting. Good job for writing about it, I think that helps!

(Hopping over from MMB. Hi.)